Fuck you, Barack Obama. Fuck. You.
You KNEW I was slated to speak last night at the Second Annual Cleveland Steamers Convention. You KNEW it was going to be cyber-casted across the aetherweb. I sent you the official press release THREE WEEKS ago. I sent you dozens of cyber-text-mails -- which went unanswered. I left you at least 30 electro-voice-messages in the past week alone, informing you that I would be speaking and to please show some common courtesy and re-schedule your acceptance speech at the DNC.
But instead of doing the right thing, you went ahead with your plan and gave your speech anyway. And as a final insult, your speech mentioned nothing -- zilch, zero, nada -- about the jaw-dropping role that the steam engine played in shaping this nation.
I cannot in good conscience vote for an anti-steampunk candidate like yourself.
I also cannot vote for you, because I am Canadian.
Fuck you, Barack Obama.
Friday, August 29, 2008
Fuck you, Barack Obama. Fuck. You.
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
My jaw just dropped when I realized it's been a jaw-dropping thirteen years since the jaw-droppingly wonderful and amazing movie "Hackers" was released, the movie that is the basis for most of my novels!
Monday, August 18, 2008
Last night, an online meanie disagreed with my opinion about Steampunk. I cried quietly to myself for a few hours, and then I called Terezzza on my iPhone. She immediately came over to my apartment, gave me a soothing sponge bath with peppermint soap, and made me this delicious peanut butter sandwich with cheetos. Later, she let me put my head in her lap. As she stroked my hair and sang soft lullabyes, I drifted off to peaceful, jaw-dropping slumber.
Saturday, August 16, 2008
Jaw? Dropping! Shirt? Covered with drool! Heart? Aching with joy! I could not be happier right now: Margaret Atwood, a relatively obscure (until now!) Canadian author, has remixed my 1999 award-mentioning short story The Secret Cyber-Diary of Captain Massengill Smugtwat into a full length novel! I haven't read it yet (I'm in the middle of an exhaustive project to translate "The Watchmen" into Kleet -- a Klingon version of leet-speak)... but I'll get to it as soon as I can! I love being able to help my fellow authors with their careers!
Thursday, August 14, 2008
My good friend Neal Stephenson has remixed my soon-to-be-award-nominated novel L177L3 BL0663r into a 950-page tour-de-force! It's a jaw-droppingly amazing honor to have helped Neal in his burgeoning career as a novelist. Stay cyber-tuned for more of my wonderful novels remixed by Margaret Atwood, Rudy Rucker, William Gibson, John Milton, J.K. Rowling, and Noam Chomsky.
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
It's not made of brass, but this soul-searingly, wonderfully beautiful little piece of bamboocraft still adds an absolutely amazingly edgy element of drool-inducing steampunkery to your kitchen! This jaw-dropping kictchenhack harnesses the incredible power of steam to heat just about anything! Apparently the Japanese have been using these achingly precious little doodads for decades. I just told my secretary Terezzza to electro-mail my personal chef about getting one. Or perhaps I will pick one up when I get to Tokyo (I'm on the plane right now as a matter of fact!)
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Monday, August 11, 2008
Mandible-lowering image of my first attempt at embryocraft! An achingly adorable picture of my newborn DNA mashup, Ascii Tiberius Gibson Babbage Tardis Fortran McSteam Devereaux! I took this with one of my brand new iPhones! I had sex!
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
"Corky, where have you been?"
I've been in meatspace for the past couple of months due to the birth of my son, Ascii Tiberius Gibson SteamJedi Devereaux. Now that I'm back in the meme-sphere, I'm wondering if I should keep maintaining this cyber-log! I'm so jaw-droppingly busy. So I pose the question to you, my steamy cyberphants: do you want me to come back? Reply to this text-cast and let me know!